Eleven (And Twelve) Months Old!

Dear William, if you can read this, you know, of course, that you are our second child.  Nothing about the order of your birth places you lower in the order of importance as compared to your brother.  In fact, despite all my fears, what they said was true:  When you came into my life, my heart grew bigger and fuller to accommodate the love I have for you.  However, while you do not have to share my love, since I grew a whole new batch of that just for you, you do have to share my attention with your brother, Cole, and he now has to share yours.  So, you see, when I do silly things like forget to post the all-important "___ Months Old!" posts, or lose them so that they appear a month into the next month of your life on this little blog, and when you see that the whole first year of your life is appearing here while we are living the second year of your life, it's because of that slippery thing called time, which is just not as abundant as I wish it could be.  It's true:  I wish I could grow time like I grow my love for my kids, more and more each day.  My garden is bursting with it, so much that as you and Cole grow older, I am feeling more and more ready to share you with the world, even if it is just by baby steps, like taking you to daycare for the first time, or watching your brother walk alone to his friend's house (just four houses down from ours, but it seemed like miles), or spending a much-needed night out with Daddy, which means leaving my precious babies with a (college-aged and well-vetted) babysitter.  And while this of course means sharing our precious time with the world, I know in my heart that it's a part of life, of helping you grow ready to explore the world and to thrive in it, even when there are times that I want nothing more than to stop time, to hold you and your brother so tightly in one unmoving frame.  Sadly, I can't grow time, but I can try my hardest to hold time--in the form of memories--in my mind, and here, on our blog.  So I'll do my best.  But know, sweet one, that even if it's a year (or two, or three, or ten) after the actual occurrence of the moments until I share them here, that I was busy loving you, cuddling you, and watching you grow, with all the love in my bursting, happy heart.  7/4/2015.